thisonetime_withkeith

[The feed clicks on, and Ellis is holding up his Zephyr badge proudly, a doofy grin on his face as the light hits it with a dramatic glare.]

Looky what I got. Man, y'all would never believe it, but that was the best battle of my life. And I've had lots of 'em since gettin' here, but hoo boy, that was just intense as hell. It was fun though, don't get me wrong! Suee fought so good though, oh my god. You ain't ever seen a piggy fight like her, let me tell you! And then the last one... Bird versus Bird. My Pidgeot against Falkner's. Hahaha, that was amazing. We whooped his ass GOOD.

Let me tell ya though, bein' surrounded by birds? It reminded me of this one time with my and my buddy Keith back home. We went to an aviary, which is this place where birds and shit just fly free, right? Well, Keith decided to practice his bird calls. Hahahahaha, oh man. Apparently there's this call that makes birds angry or somethin'. Turns out, he used that one instead of somethin' friendly, so suddenly all them birds? They attacked. Keith couldn't get outta there fast enough!

And I mean that literally! By the time he actually got out, he had claw marks and they'd pecked him to hell and back. What was worse? They plucked out like 90% of his hair, so he was bald. He had tufts of hair stickin' up everywhere and he looked like an old man with his bald head. It was insane! He gave up bird callin' after that, unfortunately. Me? I think he could've gotten good at it, but... I guess there's somethin' about gettin' attacked by birds that just kinda turns you off the idea...

Haha, luckily nothin' like that happened to me at the gym, so it's all good!